


One-sided Negotiation

by Canisa



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff, M/M, Pets, Silly, mystrade
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-12
Updated: 2016-01-12
Packaged: 2018-05-13 08:00:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5700997
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Canisa/pseuds/Canisa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Mycroft Holmes has a favor to ask Greg Lestrade and this is how he does it...  mix in a little sweetness and threats won't hurt.</p>
            </blockquote>





	One-sided Negotiation

“My dear Detective Inspector…”

“No.”

“I haven't even imparted my request yet…”

“Bloody hell, Mycroft.  I am not that stupid.  I know that tone.  I said no!”

“It will just be three nights…”

“Oh sure.  I remember the last time YOU asked.  I was exhausted for the next few days!  Not to mention the clean up!”

“Inspector.  I assure you.  The second time will be much much improved.”

“What part of no don't you understand, Holmes!  I am not your cat’s servant!”

“Sherlock is a perfect gentleman.  He may have his moments, but he is the most intelligent cat.”

“And the most spoiled cat!  Oh my god.  You useless car lover.  Your ‘perfect gentleman’ scratched up my sofa within 10 minutes of landing in my flat!”

“Yes.  And haven't I replaced your furniture?”

“I don't fancy….”

“Besides, Sherlock is such a clever boy.  I can see he only did it to test what part of the sofa can withstand the most to his nails.  Haven’t you notice the systematic pattern of his…”

“Don't tell me you save the sofa…”

“Well.  I could hardly deny Sherlock his need to explore, could I?  Inspector.   He was very fond of that sofa chair.  I had moved it into my library in front of the fireplace, so he could continue on his experiment.  Sherlock had precisely 10 scratches per leg, on the back, front cushions and on each of arms of the sofa chair.  Why, he even randomized his scratches such that he didn't just land all 10 consecutive scratches in one leg, but spread them out to different locations, removing the confounding factor of a dull nail.  The meticulous...”

“Spare me the details… The answer is still no.”

“Inspector…  Gregory… If you don't do this, I can't promise that I will have free time next week…”

“You…”

“And the week after…”

“I am not taking him in!”

“Gregory.  In addition, I am throwing away the ‘Birthday Gift’ you bestowed on me.”

“But..  But no!…. No you can't do that!”

“It is my property, Gregory.  You gifted it to me.  Even though it pleases you when I wear it, and I can surmise it ‘pleases you very much’ judging by the 36% increase in your heart rate, I do have full control of how I disposition my property.  Perhaps Sherlock would love to experiment on it.  He does have an uncanny interest in laces after all…”

“How could you… how could you even do this to me?"

“You enjoyed my negotiation skills…”

“ON Other people!  Mycroft!  Other people!”

“Well then, when shall I drop off Sherlock? Is 7pm amendable?  My flight is taking off in 2 hours and 47 minutes.  And you know how traffic is like.”

“You evil man!”

“Would you prefer I drop off Sherlock with Anthea?”

“What? No!  She would lock up Sherlock in a cage!  The last time you did that, his fur is all matted!”

“Yes.  I recall that vividly.  Sherlock certainly did not enjoy the lion cut we forced upon him afterwards, did he?”

“Oh God…that is something I want to unsee!”

“Or Sergeant Donovan”s place…”

“Mycroft!  She threw him out in the back alley!  Sherlock ended up staying with the homeless for the whole week!"

“Oh yes. And our dear Sherlock knows all the streets, back alleys, and abandoned warehouses.  It certainly came in handy that he would never be lost again.  Never mind how dirty his fur had become… And now he dislocated his right front leg, fractured his…”

“Oh… oh…..  I see what you are doing…. you are doing that on purpose.”

“Pray tell, Gregory.   What am I doing on purpose?”

“GUILT!  Mycroft!  You are trying to make me feel guilty!”

“Is 7pm amendable for the drop off?”

“Oh God, I can't believe this..”

“Gregory, my flight is in 2 hours and 33 minutes.  it’s Anthea or Sergeant Donovan…”

“Bloody hell.  Yes.  Yeah, fine.  I can't believe I am doing this again.  Fuck!”

Mycroft carefully put his umbrella away, taking 3 long strides to reached to his lover’s side.  He purred into his ear.  “Well, I do have time before boarding the flight and I am amendable to your declaration.  The question is, You or Me?”

“Jesus, Mycroft!”

Mycroft captured DI Lestrade’s lips, savoring the scent of a mixture of sweetness, beer and cigarettes.  He broke away long enough to chuckle at his lover’s sensual moaning, before he recaptured those delicious lips again. 

**ping** 

“Gregory…”

“Hummmmmm?  Oh, don't stop…come back here.”

“Actually, I just got a text from Anthea.”

“What?  No…..  Oh no… What now?”

“She informed that my travel had been extended to 2 weeks.”

“What!  Oh no.  You can't do that.  You tricked me!  That text was timed!  You knew this from the start!”

“Oh Gregory.  What should I do with you?”

“That’s my line!”

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> I had this pet universe plot line idea during the holidays and couldn't shake it off. But since I promise myself I would only work on one multi chapter story at one time.. this is what I come up with for a short standalone. Hope you like it.


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